Why Glee Made Me Cry

I guess you can call me a Gleek.  Yes, I have the DVD and almost all the CDs (I just can’t seem to get myself to buy the Madonna episode CD) and well I DVR the episodes and love watching every Tuesday.  You either love or hate the show, and well I love it, because if we actually had a glee club or show choir in high school, I probably would have joined.  I was a theater person (yeah, yeah theater people are “weird”) and I love that Glee not only features pop music, but they have musical theater.  A lot of the cast and guest stars have spent their time  on the stage  (looooooove Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth) and I feel like it gives theater a positive light.

I had a final on Tuesday so I didn’t get a chance to watch it until Wednesday, and I’m not going to lie.  I cried.  But why did I cry?  It took me a second to really tap into my feelings.

I miss Bill.  Bill Collier was my mentor, my teacher, my friend.  It’s almost been 2 years since I last saw him.  He was frail, in pain, but he kept on smiling for my sake.  Selfish me, for crying for him, because I was really crying for me.  I was crying because I knew I was losing something incredible, but for him he was going on a new adventure, getting the answers to what was beyond this life.  So when I got the call September 6, 2008 my knees buckled my heart broke, and I cried for months.

I was watching those Glee kids sing “To Sir, with Love,” and I instantly missed my teacher, my friend, who watched me grow up from a young girl to an adult.  I never got to say goodbye to him, and maybe that’s just the way he wanted it.  I remember my last lesson with him, I sang with all my heart, and he told me that he was proud of me.  I never knew that would be the last time I would sing for him, that would be the last lesson I would take, and I’m so glad that I was able to make him so proud one last time.

Cancer made him weak, put him in pain, but he never let it change his sunny disposition.   He was an incredible teacher, friend, and human being.  I wish everyone was able to meet him and learn the lessons he taught me over the years, and I find myself incredibly lucky to be able to spend 8 years with him.

After watching the episode, I told Chris that I miss Bill and he told me that he missed hearing me sing, which made me cry a little more because I haven’t really been able to sing since Bill died.  I miss singing, and I do every once in awhile, but not the way I used to it.  I know Bill would want me to still sing, so I promise myself that I will sing again.

Cancer has taken away many people in my life, and it affects everyone.  Please donate to ThinkCure for cancer research.  The ThinkCure Dodgers Telethon is going on right now, and their goal is $400,000.  Please help them reach their goal.  I donated to ThinkCure,  and just saw my name on TV! Visit the ThinkCure website or Text CURE to 50555 to donate $10 or  call 866-554-CURE.

He was definitely an entertainer.

My donation.

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